I never was fully convinced beyond the basic concept of Karma.
I've never been a vindictive person... sure I've been angry and wanted bad things to happen to people that have wronged me. But never did I think if I 'turned the other cheek' and went on my merry way, would Karma deal them with a hand that was in direct confrontation with what they feared or were unable to handle themselves.
People say " God doesn't give you what you can't handle "
Now anyone that knows me knows, I don't necessary subscribe to that theory.
In this case, after being with Brian for 2 years, knowing he had no interest in children. Knowing he was very confused about his interest in Crossdressing and being used by men. And thinking I could change him and we'd be together forever... was a precursor for my Karmic eventuality.
Once I realised that he wouldn't change, that anything I encouraged or discouraged would just amplify his interests... I got lazy...
Eventually when he broke up with me in July, I could have unwrapped a very bitter disclosure about his interests to his friend and family who would be mortified. Did I want to? Yes. Did I ? No, counting on Karma to find a moment in his life to hand him something that would balance the bad he dealt me.
My friend M, formerly a co worker, informed me that her cousin was with a guy, named Brian, who was from Rockford, who installed dog fences... liked to hunt and fish, last name is the same and was pregnant.
Just goes to show you, you don't have to fuck someone over when they do wrong to you... it happens naturally...
I'm so giddy it's terrible... but it looks like being good isn't all that bad... :)
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"Karma is a sum of all that an individual has done, is currently doing and will do. Individuals go through certain processes and accompanying experiences throughout their lives which they have chosen, and those would be based on the results of their own creations. Karma is the effects of all deeds actively create past, present and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain and joy it brings to others." And yes,it can be a bitch!
Sometimes I think we were twins.... or mother and child, then child and mother in a former life... What's up with finding someone you know you've had a past with that's not at all romantic but just as strong and supportive as a romantic encounter?
You continue some of my thoughts like you are in my head... don't go in the corners... the monsters hide there :) Love you Wendylady.
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